


Patience and Fury

by kromatus, tamagoyakiis



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Bodyguard, Estinien is Estinien, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Padjal Original Character, Traveling, White Mage | WHM (Final Fantasy XIV)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-26
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:28:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26654446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kromatus/pseuds/kromatus, https://archiveofourown.org/users/tamagoyakiis/pseuds/tamagoyakiis
Summary: Estinien is tasked by Aymeric de Borel to protect and defend a white mage that has been sent on a relief mission throughout Dravania and other areas affected by the Dragonsong War. He's not ecstatic, but he does it regardless. He was never expecting to get to know the woman being protected, or cultivate an interest in her.This is all very, very new to him.Written in collaboration with tamagoyakiis.
Relationships: Estinien Wyrmblood/Original Character(s)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 8





	1. Chapter 1

It had been a few weeks since Ran-E officially moved to Ishgard but those weeks were not nearly enough time for her to adjust to the harsh Coerthan climate. Every day she found herself bundled up far more than any of the Ishgardians that she met. In fact, the very sight of her was more than enough to elicit not only teasing from Haurchefant but a chuckle or two from Aymeric nearly every day. Their laughs and jests were simply met with a huff from Ran-E as she ignored them through her second woolen scarf.

"Ran-E..."

"Hmm?" Ran-E hummed, not looking up from the papers in her hand, "What is it, Haurchefant?"

"I do hope you realize that you are the cause for the nakedness of all the Karakul in Coerthas."

Pausing from her reading, she looked up and turned to meet the eyes of the elezen knight and squinted. 

"Don't speak to me like that. Not when you are the sole cause of kukuru shortages!" she huffed, her reaction causing the knight to laugh heartily at her flushed face.

Truthfully, Haurchefant was one of the reasons she really began to enjoy her time in Ishgard. He was the first friendly face she had met and did not cease in continuing geniality. His presence alone was more than enough to warm up any chilly room she was in. Well, sort of. At times she very much enjoyed the company of a fireplace and hot tea. It was while she thought of the few weeks she had spent with him that he drew closer to look at the paper in her hands.

"This is?"

"This? Oh, this is a short brief on what I'm meant to do for the following two weeks," she looked back towards the paper to glance over the words, "I'm to travel to a few places and give my expertise in healing and medicine...one such place is Dravania; and admittedly I am nervous. Anyx Trine is rather far, is it not?"

"Hm... It is quite a trip but I do not doubt that you will have ample protection. Aymeric would never allow any harm to come to you."

"Unfortunately in this brief it's not written who will be accompanying me... And today Aymeric is busy so the guard accompanying me is to meet me at the airship landing..." Ran-E bit her lip as she looked down at her backpack, jumping when Haurchefant exclaimed with excitement.

"Then allow me to escort you to the airship landing! I have little doubt that Aymeric leant you the finest knights he could! Come, let us go meet your knights!"

At that, Haurchefant quickly took Ran-E's hand and started walking towards the entrance. Attempting to keep up with his long gait, she just barely grabbed at the straps of her backpack and her staff that rested against the desk. The elezen seemed far more excited to see who would be on bodyguard detail than her as she found her stomach instead churning with uneasiness. As she braced herself to be hit by the frozen breeze, the two quickly made their way to the airship landing. Well, as quick as they could while Ran-E stumbled behind Haurchefant’s unintentionally quick pace.

oo

"Bodyguard duty..." Estinien huffed as he paced the airship landing, the armor clinking and clanking. The words forced bile into his throat. All manor of irritation sent his skin to prickle until he moved faster and faster. But no relief came until he jumped to the top of the Astrologian headquarters and sat on the edge of the building. Being a dragoon, much less the _Azure_ dragoon, had its perks with mobility.

"Bodyguard duty!" He guffawed again and leaned back until he rested on the roof of the building. "Who does Aymeric think he is? This is utterly ridiculous. I have more important things to do..."

A habit he picked up from some years of solitude and even his time with Nidhogg: he talked to himself a lot. There was nothing to gain from it but it didn't leave him feeling so alone sometimes.

His mind wandered to the description of this body he'd be guarding. A small woman, a padjal, he'd said. _What in the hells is a padjal?_

"Don't worry," Estinien mocked the other elezen man as he ran his hand through his hair and sat up again, "you can't miss her… Bloody fool..."

His eyes scanned over everybody at the landing. No one stood out. Everyone was the same. The same until he spotted the blubbering Ser Haurchefant, chattering away excitedly to...someone that was not another elezen. An au ra, perhaps?

Estinien stood tall before jumping from the roof and diving down to his acquaintance, rolling on the ground to break his fall.

"-and so that was the moment we knew the war was over."

"Amazing... I feel I had just met her on her first adventure and n- _ah_!"

"Haurchefant," he spoke coldly, before his icey eyes drifted to the small woman, "and I presume the body in needs of guarding?"

The movement was quick, precise, and above all it was absolutely startling. Jumping at the appearance of an armored stranger, she placed a hand over her chest in some attempt to still her heart as she peered out from behind Haurchefant.

_Ah. When did she hide behind him?_

"Estinien! You're more than ample!" Haurchefant's eyes had lit up at the sight of the dragoon and he leaned towards Ran-E, noticing she had moved behind him. Of course, this would not do in his presence and he smoothly moved in order to put an arm around her shoulder and nudge her closer to Estinien. "One of our most esteemed dragoons accompanying our newest resident white mage on an adventure…! This is...simply fantastic!"

As Haurchefant rambled on, clearly diving into his own fantasies, Ran-E couldn't help but stare at the dragoon's armor. The armor itself was impressive and had clearly seen more combat than she could fathom, but what was even more impressive was the man underneath it all. Estinien, as her friend had let slip, was very much an imposing figure with an aura that could silence even the busiest of establishments.

Seconds passed and she became more and more aware of her staring but it was so hard to tear her eyes away from him. The only thing that she could help herself from staring at, however, was his face. Just a glimpse of his jaw and the silvery locks against the collar of his armor was enough to let her know that he was definitely far too handsome for his own good. The Twelve really decided not to have any type of mercy on her.

"...exhilarating!" Haurchefant's voice came back into focus as Ran-E broke her inspecting gaze to glance up at the talkative knight. "Allow me to save the rest of my breath to introduce you two."

_Save his breath_. She nearly scoffed at the thought of Haurchefant saving any breath for anyone but himself as he could very possibly use up the realm's supply to keep talking. Holding back her scoff instead to give a little half chuckle, she allowed him to keep going.

"Estinien! This is Ran-E-Toya of Gridania, a Padjali White Mage!"

Ran-E glanced back towards Estinien, still refusing to fully look him in the face and bowed her head down in respect. Upon fully standing back up, Haurchefant spoke once more.

"And Ran-E, this is Estinien Wyrmblood, Ishgard's one and only Azure Dragoon! Don't let his tough exterior intimidate you. I assure you that Estinien is a very good man through and through.”

Taking in Haurchefant’s warm and assuring smile, Ran-E couldn’t help but return it as she completely trusted him. It was as she was about to speak up that Haurchefant jumped and seemed to realize something. Furrowing a brow at his behavior, she had no doubt that he realized he spent far too much time talking and walking rather than going back to his post at Camp Dragonhead. Reaching up to pat his arm gently, she gave him a curt nod.  
“Go on. No doubt your men are wondering where you are by now. Don’t let them think you’ve finally decided to run off with your Warrior of Light,” Ran-E teased.

“Haha! You certainly know what goes on in my mind by now,” the blue-haired elezen laughed, “but alright I shall take my leave now. I wish you both luck on your adventure. Farewell now!” With that, Haurchefant gave a wave and turned to jog down the cobblestone path to make his way towards the gate.

Now feeling all too aware of herself, the Padjal felt uncomfortable in her own skin as the silence grew closer and closer to palpable. Taking in a deep breath and letting it out shakily, she bravely turned to look towards her now bodyguard and properly introduce herself, hopefully making her own impression rather than let Haurchefant’s introduction become the only one for her. Looking at his collar, she released her bottom lip from her teeth’s gentle grip (she didn’t even realize she had bit her lip) and opened her mouth to speak.

“It’s a pleasure and an honor to make your acquaintance! I’m Ran-E-Toya of Gridania, as Haurchefant mentioned…” she bowed her head down slightly, hoping that the dragoon did not somehow already despise her presence.

Short. Very short. And horns. Upon seeing her, he remembered the other short, horned people of Gridania. He'd only seen them but once or twice, as they remained hidden within their own guild or with the Gridanian leader, Kan-E-Senna. A Padjali white mage outside Gridania, though... What a sight to behold. He wondered how quick he could scare her off. But with the injuries and casualties Ishgard had suffered through the Dragonsong war, even at his own doing, Estinien couldn't deny the help, and he held his tongue.

"A white mage, you say?" He mulled the words over in his mouth like a thick mead, "I've known healers of all types but it's rare to see one so far from her little hovel." 

It wasn't a lie to say he loved when he towered over people. Height aside, he knew when he was intimidating based on his looks and voice alone. "Am I escorting you home, little lady?" He leaned over, his face in front of hers, "Or are you just wasting my time?"

“Yes, it is rather far from Gridania...” Ran-E said softly, looking up when she heard him move closer only to look right into his dark blue eyes. Finally seeing his face, she froze and hoped he wouldn’t be able to tell how nervous he made her, but she knew that’d be impossible. He was a keen hunter and he probably picked up on her subtlest body language.

She smelled of fresh lavender and the cold of the air around her. A wisp of her hair trailed across his face with the wind and it tickled his nose and tangled in his eyelashes before leaving him again.

“Home...? I had just...oh. I’m actually going to be staying in Ishgard for a year starting three weeks ago!” She felt a strange burst of bravery surge in her through her refusal to be intimidated, but it died quickly as she thought mentioning Dravania might be a sore spot. “I’ll...be assisting in the rebuilding of Ishgard and strengthening relations with Dravania...as both sides have suffered.”

"I may be rid of the dragon, but my wrath can always return should my time be wasted." With those words he rose, unhooking his helmet from his belt clip with one hand and pulling his long hair up with the other before securing the helm on and pulling the visor down. "Where to first?"

_Way to go, wimp. Now he’ll think you're no more than a coward_ , Ran-E scolded herself in her mind. Shifting her gaze down and furrowing a brow at this thought, she heard him mention being ‘ _rid of the dragon_ ’ and wondered what he meant by that. The war was definitely over but she wasn’t told any of the finer details. Her time to ponder quickly ended as he asked her a simple question.

“First...we’re meant to travel to Anyx Trine but as Idyllshire is on the way I’d like to make an overnight stop there.” She peeked up at him between her thoughts and watched him tuck his hair into his helm. _It must be incredibly hot under the tight helm_ , she thought.

“If time allows, as the Dravanians are the main priority, I’d like to check in with the beast tribes in the area...from what I’ve heard the Vath are very interesting from a psychological perspective. Oh, but of course I understand if that’s too much trouble! I’d just like to ensure the wellbeing of as many as possible...if possible.”

Estinien only scoffed at her words. She talked too much and her tonal transitions were irritating against his ears.

"Idyllshire is a pile of rubble, barely anywhere to rest properly outside of Hismena's. I know I can make do," he reached back and double checked that his lance was secured tightly to it's lock on the back of his armor, "but are you even sure if you can? Living with Aymeric just further softens anyone, much less a pampered Padjal from Gridania..."

But if that's where she was going, he would not argue. There was no point in fighting this assignment. The faster he got it over with, the faster he could return to his dragoon duties, and...other things that have since piqued his interest lately.

Adjusting the grip on her staff, Ran-E also made sure to ready herself for their departure. The last thing she wanted was to become heavier of a burden right off the bat. As she fastened her staff to the side of her backpack, she looked up at him when he spoke.

"It's less about if I can and more about what can happen. Being so close to war, I'm certain there are some around there that would like some assistance," she looked towards the airship, thinking a moment more on what she wanted to articulate. "But regardless of what you think of me and my background, I assure you that I'm not here to be ' _pampered_.'"

_Aymeric will owe me for this_. She's already a handful. The armor clinked as he led the way, adjusting his armlets, "Let's get going then. No time to waste."

Certainly she was not a fighter of any kind, as her healing skills far surpassed any kind of combative skills she possessed, but she wouldn't let the dragoon talk down to her. She knew him only by title and introduction and it must be the same for him, but allowing him to judge her solely on that did not sit well with her.

With Llymlaen as her silent witness, she swore that she'd prove all her worth to Estinien during the next two weeks. While she didn't understand the deep need to gain his approval, she brushed it off in favor of following after him as he was right. There definitely was no time to waste.

_Definitely no time to waste_ , Ran-E thought to herself as traveling to Idyllshire was fairly quiet. The last couple days were awkward to say the least and thankfully this would be the last day of travel before they finally made it to the goblin home.

oo

Airships didn't settle right with Estinien. It...was both unnatural and all too familiar. Flying through the air and feeling the wind on your scales — no, not scales. Not scales, not wings, none of that. The time he shared with Nidhogg was both the best and worst time of his life. The dragon blood coursing through his veins, the power he held, the strength with every _thwap_ of his wings, it was _addicting_. It was addicting and it was delicious and it felt so godsdamned good. After all the pain and suffering he went through at the claw of the dragons, to be their leader, to feel the rage and vengeance pump his heart, was exhilarating.

But with Nidhogg's strength and power, Estinien shared the dragon's hatred and scorn. When the intoxication faded, and when they were alone in the sky, flying through the clouds, there was nothing but pain. When they landed and rested, Estinien screamed and roared and released the hurt from within him the best he could. But there was no releasing it. There was no freedom from this torment, this torture.

Even now, in the dead of night, it filled him and churned in his gut. It kept him up through the godless nights, alone except for the company of the myriads of stars in the black sky. How he wished he could have flown to another star and just faded away.

But Hydaelyn wasn't so merciful.

Happy for the peace, Ran-E settled herself further into her seat and wrapped her muffler closer to her neck. Plucking a book out of her backpack, she opened it up to her bookmark and started reading. Or, well, she intended on reading but couldn’t help looking over her book at Estinien. What was he thinking about?

He felt her eyes on him. She lit a fire under him enough to furrow his brows and force a scowl on his lips. "Are you going to stare at me the whole trip or what?" he snapped before thinking.

There was a strange look on his face and she couldn't discern whether or not it was longing or impatience. It was clear that there was something weighing on his mind but her own thoughts flew right out the airship when he snapped at her. Startled by his tone, Ran-E flinched and unconsciously tightened the grip on her book.

There was definitely something that had him on edge and that itself worried her greatly.

His mind pulsed and pain jolted through him. It was blinding and hot. His hands rushed to his head as he gripped the helmet tightly, gritting his teeth.

_Dragons...nearby…_

"What-" Ran-E started but she immediately cut herself when Estinien gripped at his head. It was clear he was in pain, _but from what?_

Quickly shoving her book aside, she rose from her seat and reached for her staff. Moving closer to him without a second of hesitation, the thought of him shoving her away from him crossed her mind briefly. Deciding that falling on her ass was the least of her concerns, she took the chance and acted on her worry. It didn't matter if he was the warrior or bodyguard, she refused to let him be hurt in any way.

After all, that's why the elementals chose her, right?

"Estinien," she knelt in front of him and leaned in, placing a hand on the seat by him, "tell me what's wrong."

Tighter and tighter he gripped. If he still had his dragon strength, he was sure he would crush the helmet. The noise was so loud he couldn't really hear what was happening around him.

"Est.....tell.....wrong," he heard through the fog.

But he couldn't open his eyes. He couldn't handle the light or the color right now. The dragon's force was getting stronger and stronger and he wasn't sure if they were trying to speak with him or kill him.

_This must be...the remainder of Nidhogg's...brood…_

Estinien cursed the Twelve, all the primals and even the Warrior of Light. But none of this was their fault. None of what he did could ever be their fault. He had been weak and easily swayed over, drunk on the power he held, tied to the giant dragon by their shared scorn.

"H-head..." he managed between gasps. "D..."

It would be useless to tell her of nearby dragons. He couldn't feel them on the move, as they were most likely still in hiding. So he held his tongue and only hissed in pain.

_Cure. Benediction. Tetragrammation-_

Her eyes glanced over Estinien over and over as her mind flirted through all the most potent healing spells she knew. Which one would best help this situation? Maybe she should even use Repose and lay him down to rest?

“Ah!” She knew which spell to use.

Standing to her full height, she took a step back and held up her staff, closing her eyes to focus. The familiar warm light enveloped her body as she attempted to concentrate the spell into a much smaller veil. A second passed and there was a gentle glimmer of light that enveloped the two and their surrounding area. The spell wasn’t as small as she liked, but even she could feel the strong concentration of her own aether charge the air between them. It was a warm, prickly sensation that soothed itself over her skin and she could feel her heartbeat slow to a safer pace.

Thankful for her now steadier hands, she placed her staff on the seats beside Estinien and moved closer to him, reaching for his hands. With a gentle but firm hand, she peeled his hands away from his head and searched for the lock of his helm. Luckily she had seen him put it on and remove it a few times and finding the lock was easier than she thought and with a _click_ she slid it off his head with great care.

He was not unfamiliar with the feeling of aetherial healing. It prickled on his skin like electrified snowflakes. Within moments, the pressure began to release from his head, he allowed himself to open his eyelids, if only barely. And he let the healer pry his hand away from his head purely from the exhaustion the relief brought him. The bubble of aether and healing shone bright and sparkled like dust in the morning sun. Oh how he wished he could be home already.

It was bold of her to remove his helmet, but he always liked bold. Right now, however, he was not a fan of such a move. There was nothing he hated more than feeling vulnerable, much less vulnerable around a stranger and from something outside of his control. In his mind's eye, he could see the dragons roosting in the mountains, hiding away. None seemed too interested in his presence from what he could decipher, but there was no doubt at least _one_ was trying to gain his attention. Was this dragon trying to spur him into another murderous rampage? Try to reignite the war? What could be gained?

He was no fool. Not anymore.

With what felt like all the concern in the world, she knelt down and leaned in towards his face, voice low and her tone soothing.

“Estinien...you don’t have to speak but let me know what I can do for you.”

Twelve damn it, she wanted to hold him so bad and reassure him that everything was and will continue to be okay. In the years she had trained as a white mage so far, she had felt plenty helpless. After all, the first step to being a great healer was realizing that even with all the aether in the world, not even the Elder Seedseer could stop death should it be nature’s will. But here...right now with Estinien...she felt that she would even personally confront Rhalgr himself to give Estinien a chance to breathe.

"Don't concern yourself with me." He spoke coldly, the remainder of the pain melting away. Static filled his head and coursed through his veins from the adrenaline wearing off. His eyelids grew heavier. Unable to hold himself up, he slumped to the side, the armor buckling underneath his weight and movement. "I'd just like a rest now."

_Don't concern yourself with me._

Who in the realm did he think she was? He very well knew she is a healer, literally designated at birth, that was here to help. Furrowing a brow, she unwrapped her scarf from around her neck and slipped off her coat. Draping the coat over his body, she then slid her staff aside some before moving him in order to slide into the seat next to his.

"Don't talk such shite," she muttered, mostly to herself rather than him.

Balling up her scarf, she pulled him closer to her body and put the scarf between his head and her shoulder, allowing the knit accessory to act as a pillow. She knew that he would have nothing but complaints and it was incredibly likely that he'd give her a hard time later, but right now none of that mattered.

Every muscle in his body tensed at her touches. It was unwelcome, uncomfortable, but he was too tired to really push her away or move somewhere else. Would it really be so bad to let himself just rest for once since his journey began with the Warrior of Light and the little thorn in his side with white hair. Not like the night was so kind to him to let him have a full night's sleep without the deafening roar shattering his slumber and forcing him awake, or the cold wind seeping into his hovel. When was the last time he slept through the night without interruption?

Allowing her hand to push away a few strands of hair that fell into his face, she leaned into his head and placed the smallest of kisses. The touch was charged heavily with aether, casting a gentle Regen that should help soothe him and allow him to fall asleep easily.

He forced his body to relax and closed his eyes again. He wanted so badly to tell her to not get the wrong idea, to not think of him so easily coddled or influenced by her magicks. A long exhale fluttered the strands in his face before she tucked them away. No war, no battle, no assignment could prepare him for the gentle touch of her lips pushed against his temple. His heart skipped a beat. How dare she think she could offer him such a gesture when he had no fight in him?

Without a word, a huff, or anything else he could manage, he drifted into a dreamless sleep.

Watching the dark sky through the slowly waning glimmer of her previous spell, she felt Estinien's body relaxing against her. The fact that he didn't use any of his remaining strength to force her away from him sent a wave of relief through her body and she found herself relaxing along with him. Looking down towards his helm that lay next to her staff, she stared long and hard.

There was no way he'd tell her what happened and there was a small part of her that felt she only put herself further on his bad side. Another part of her thought that was fine; she'd let him absolutely detest her and refuse working anywhere near her if that allowed for his well being. But why was she so compelled to help this seemingly ungrateful man?

Glancing towards his now sleeping face, she figured it must be some sort of healer instinct or the feeling of needing to prove herself to him.

Adjusting herself more comfortably in her seat, she looked off to the distance and watched the dark skies. Knowing that would have been Estinien's choice, to keep a lookout for any possible threats, she decided to take on that duty. Admittedly, it was also nice to distract herself from the ~~unapologetically handsome~~ slumbering man at her side. It was strange how at peace and harmless he seemed when his guard was down.

oo

Dreamless sleep never felt so good. Estinien groaned and stretched out his legs before shifting around and opening his eyes. Soft light filtered through the windows of the airship. _Must have knocked out for a few hours... Good enough. Makes the trip easier._ With a yawn, he lifted his head and tilted his head right and left, stretching out the muscles, before his eye caught the young Padjali next to him. With a start, Estinien jumped a little to the side with a jump in his heart as well.

She slept soundly next to him. Well, must have been, until he startled himself. She stirred a bit in her sleep — her eyebrows furrowed and unfurrowed quickly and her lips twisted a bit — before she readjusted herself and seemed to fall back into her slumber.

_Best not to wake her up, I guess…_

How long had he been out? He would have loved to stand, but he was stuck on the inner seat and he wasn't the most graceful in such close quarters. Clenching his jaw, he just resettled into his seat and crossed his arms over his chest.

"I hate airships..."

Blinking a few times, her eyes saw only sunset as her mind floated higher. It felt as though she lay still in a body of water that gently rocked her. The last thing she remembered was brushing aside Estinien's hair before staring out the window of the airship. There was a dull pain in her skull emanating from her horns. It was a dull pain caused by the years of shaving down the sign of her heritage, one that stood only to remind her of her childhood.

Moving her hand up to touch her horn, her arm was met with resistance and suddenly she was sinking. Grains of sand slipped past her arms and she moved her arms slowly, trying to pull herself up. Pushing against the slipping sand, she began sitting up, fighting against the weight of her body that seemed determined to keep her down. Nearly halfway towards sitting up, her body was engulfed in a cold sensation that caused her breath to leave her.

Where was she? Did the airship crash? Where was Estinien?

Waves pushed and rolled over her body and before her was a pole. Reaching out, she wrapped her arms around it and felt its warmth. Pressing her cheek against it, she allowed it to calm her beating heart as she kept her eyes shut tight and protected from the salty sea water.

Gods, her horns throbbed.

The sudden grip on him set his nerves on fire and tightened him up faster than a brisk chill in the air. She clung to him like she was being carried away and the way her face contorted lended him further into that direction. What could she possibly be dreaming about to possess her to wrap herself around him, armor and all? There were myriads of spikes protruding from him, it was a wonder she could cling so tight without impaling herself.

And what could he even do? He may not be the most sensitive man, but he knew better than to wake someone for no need. Rest was a precious commodity now in the antebellum time. So he only sighed, and forced his body to loosen under her touch. He would normally not be so high strung around such a small woman, but after seeing the power and might within the tiny Warrior of Light, he knew better than to take any person for granted. And with the rise of primals of all types, he knew when someone would become tempered and go on a killing spree.

“What an annoyance...” the disgruntled dragoon muttered under his breath.

With as little sudden movement he could manage, he wrestled his arms free and propped his head on his knuckles with his elbow on one armrest and allowed the other to drape over the young woman beside him. If he was going to be used as a pillow, he might as well be comfortable too. It was only the start of their trip, and there were many long nights and days ahead of them.

As quickly as the rush of cold water overtook her body, it was replaced completely with a familiar warmth. Nuzzling her face further into the sensation, it felt rigid and almost painful as it poked into her skin. It was near uncomfortable to be blanketed by the unmoving force, but she preferred it greatly over the sensation of floating away.

Relaxing into the presence, and let out a sigh before relaxing into a gentle darkness that enveloped her. It felt like hours, maybe days? Perhaps only minutes passed when she felt something poke at her eye. Furrowing her brow, she moved her face only to feel whatever she buried her face into was quite scratchy and uncomfortable. At this she moved her hand to rub at her eyes before opening them, feeling the same warm and rigid presence under her hand as she dragged it towards her.

Rubbing at her eyes and allowing a yawn to course through her body, she began moving back to meet resistance. She blinked down at the dark metal and strands of silvery thread in front of her. How curious, she thought.

The gears started turning in her head as the familiar armor started a checklist in her brain. Her eyes darted up to see more of the silver thread which she had now realized was hair and her body tensed up in fear.

Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no _oh no._

Slowly moving her gaze further up, her eyes noticed the sharp jawline of the unfriendly dragoon and her heart practically stopped right then and there. Letting out a shaky breath she hadn't realized she was holding, much like how she hadn't realized she was holding Estinien. The one thing that stood out the most to her, though, was that she enjoyed his touch. Perhaps it was from her years of being regarded as a holy figure before a person, but she wanted to stay in his arms.

Twelve be kind...


	2. Chapter 2

She had much to work on before she could be considered stealthy in the least but he supposed healers don't need to be so stealthy. She stirred under his arm and nuzzled herself further in. Estinien kept his focus outside the window, and on the clouds they flew through. The sun had already dipped below the horizon, leaving behind it warm hues and the lingering sensation of daylight behind. Stars twinkled into existence in the sky. Those from the Steppe would consider this Nhaama waking up and opening her many sparkling eyes. He missed the Steppe a lot, though he only was there for a blink of an eye.

"You lack in stealth, young padjal..." He muttered without looking over to her, "I thought to let you sleep but it seems we are birds of a feather, in a sense..."

Insomnia plagued him most nights. Due to restlessness or panic, it never mattered. He slept in intervals of a few hours at a time before his body jolted him awake, if he even fell asleep at all. In fact, the most he had slept peacefully was this day. How he envied those who were able to sleep soundlessly through the night with no troubles, no nightmares, no panic, nothing.

Would it be too much to ask of this healer to grant him a full night's sleep every night with her magic?

"I...I'm sorry..." She whispered.

Now all too aware of his arm that was draped around her, she wasn't sure if she wanted to move it away or stay in their position. Resting her forehead against his abdomen, she relaxed her grip a bit (although fully relaxing was definitely going to be a task and a half). Feeling her face warm up as she looked down, her eyes struggled to find a spot to settle on.

"I wasn't trying to be sneaky...I promise," she muttered out even lower than before. Her thoughts wandered across multiple questions of whether or not he was upset or bothered by her before she jumped a bit before turning her head towards his.

"Estinien...! Did you sleep well? Well enough for being on an airship leaning halfway over onto me, I mean." Searching his face for any inkling of an expression, she had to push back thoughts of how attractive he truly was and how lucky she was to be able to look at him so close. He didn't seem the type to take off his helm for as long as possible, not even when the day's sun burned bright hot.

So how in the realm did this man keep his hair so shiny and soft?

He should probably move, he thought. Move and release her. There's no benefit for either of them to be so close, right? But his body was still exhausted and heavy and it wasn't the worst thing he'd ever experienced.

"This time, for the first time in...many moons... I slept fine."

He angled himself a bit more to look out the window, clenching and releasing his jaw. Below the airship, the mountain ranges began to clear, and the hinterlands came into view. Ancient Sharlayan architecture, crumbling beneath the weight of time, yawned and greeted the airship.

With her head against his chest, she wondered if she could hear his heartbeat or if hers was beating so strongly that it echoed in her ears. Moving her hand so she could rest her cheek against it rather than his armor, she felt a faint rumble in his chest as he spoke.

_I slept fine._

Gears started to turn in her head as Estinien spoke again, his tone riddled with disbelief. As soon as the gears clicked into place, she turned her head quickly and looked at him with sparkling eyes. "E...Estinien...! While we're together if you're unable to sleep then I'd like to assist you. Whether it's with magick or just relaxing I'd like to do what I can."

With her offer, he felt a weight lifted from his shoulders. It was a bit of a comfort to know he had an option for sleep aid, even if asking for things was not in his nature.

The passing of mountain peaks and fog caught his attention.

"It can't be... Are we truly almost to Idyllshire already? How long have we slept?"

Pursing her lips as she began to feel shy about her offer, she moved her head to look as much as she could out the window from her position. She saw little more than clouds and distant structures.

"We couldn't have slept more than a full night's rest… I stayed awake for a bit but fell asleep before I knew it," Ran-E said, distracted by the passing clouds and her thoughts. "Thankfully nothing happened and we'll soon be able to set our feet on the ground for longer than an hour."

"We've definitely been asleep longer than I've slept in moons now," he muttered, "if we're already in the Hinterlands. We should be landing shortly, and I could use a bath and to stretch my legs. I don't do well in cramped spaces..."

If it could be believed, it _was_ possible to feel claustrophobic in your own skin. Since his inhabitation of a dragon body, his own skin felt too tight at times. In moments of rest, when he felt a bit cramped in his muscles, he wished so hard to stretch his wings.

But he had no more wings. He had no way to fly.

“A bath sounds nice,” she said quietly, distracted still by the passing scenery. Eventually she laid her head back down against him and relaxed her body, letting the silence settle between them.

"So close..." He spoke to himself only.

Soon enough, the airship landed safely and Ran-E eagerly collected her bag, ready to finally be back on solid ground. Stepping out of the ship, the first thing she noticed was the weather. The air was cool due to the elevation but what got her was that it was significantly warmer than Ishgard. With a sigh, she paused to peel off her heavy outer coat and held onto it along with her thick scarf.

The next order of business was to stretch and she lifted her arms and felt her body shiver with satisfaction. “Mmm! That feels good...!”

Turning to look for Estinien, she wondered if he’d be the same. He did mention before that he didn’t do well in cramped spaces and that worried her. Unsure if it was him being claustrophobic or perhaps dragoons simply preferred space to move, she hoped he’d feel significantly better with their landing.

Fresh air had never felt so good in his lungs and against his skin. Hastily he removed his helmet and hooked it to his belt, stretching his arms up and out to his side. Estinien groaned with the pleasure of finally stretching his limbs.

In one fluid motion, he bent at the waist and touched his toes before stretching out his legs. If he got in another airship ever again it'd be too soon.

Strands of white hair fell into his face. He contemplated if it was worth investing in one of those bands he'd seen women wear to tie up their hair. Sometimes he grew too stuffy and even claustrophobic in his own helmet.

"Come," he walked past the padjal girl and through the gates of Idyllshire, "let's hurry and do what needs be done to settle in for the night."

Watching the man stretch, she couldn't help the smile that made its away to her lips. He already looked leagues better and that brought great relief to her heart. It was soon that he walked past her and she held her coat tighter to her body as she followed after him. Gods, he had an incredibly long stride.

Looking around as they walked, she saw that this settlement was far from a pile of rubble as he had described. It's true that it was definitely no Gridania or Limsa, and even Ishgard seemed to be in better shape, but it was definitely kept as well as it could be. What they did have, though, worked for them and kept them alive.

It was very clear, however, that either they didn't receive many visitors or that Estinien and her stood out from the way the inhabitants perked up at their presence. Perhaps it's because he's a dragoon or maybe they were staring at her horns... Gods how she hated when people stared at her horns.

"They sure have cleaned the place up since last I was here..." Estinien muttered under his breath. "Hismena does it again..."

A couple people withdrew from their solitary and quiet lives in the old establishment. Some gave him dirty looks which he didn't mind or pay attention to, but there were others who looked past him.

The gall of these bastards. The thought of making a scene came to mind, but his attention was called elsewhere when he heard his own name called out.

"Estinien?" Hismena poked her head out from behind a large door with a Sharlayan crest on it. "What in the hells are you doing here?" She emerged in her always exciting outfit and made her way down the stairs, passing behind a giant monolith.

"Hismena," he groaned quietly, "I'm here on official business. I'm escorting this healer to the battlefields for her...whatever," he waved his hand. "We were told to stop here and arrangements were made. I'm surprised you hadn't heard."

"Heard? I'm not in charge of that shite." She waved off his words, eyeing down Ran-E before offering a smile, "Welcome to Idyllshire. Hope you enjoy your time. And don't let this jackarse bother you too much."

The call of Estinien's name was enough to pull her out of her own thoughts and saw a rather cute midlander talking to him. Feeling a bit intrusive and left out, she opted to look around their immediate area and tried her hardest not to eavesdrop. (She did.) It was when she was examining a fairly exciting pattern in the marble that she picked up on the word 'healer' and tuned back in. The cute girl—Hismena, she gathered—was looking right at her and giving her a friendly welcome.

"Thank you, I greatly appreciate it," she smiled back, "thus far I have no complaints of Estinien...he's been—" Her voice grew quieter towards the end while she tried to think of exactly what word she wanted to use.

Estinien only scowled. He had little footing to speak too harshly, especially after his actions and almost destroying the establishment. "If you'll excuse us... And get these vultures to quit staring."

Estinien took hold of the padjals hand and pulled her behind him and past the crowds of people. The faster they could get out of eyesight, the better.

"Ah—! It was nice to meet you—!" she called back towards Hismena before keeping up with Estinien to the best of her ability.

While she also wasn't the biggest fan of large crowds and staring, there was a new seed of worry bubbling up in her chest for the elezen. Gripping his hand tighter, she quickened her pace and followed closely. She only stopped once he did and all her movement was cut off when she nearly ran into his back.

It was quieter where they were. While it wasn't like people were speaking loudly in the area before but their stares were more than enough to give her a forming headache.

"Estinien...how are you feeling?"

"Fine," he retorted quickly and coldly, "Just fine. I just don't like crowds, is all."

Concern bubbled even further in her chest at his quick reply but she'd be lying if crowds didn't set her on edge either. She was more than used to the hustle and bustle of the busy city states but it was certainly leagues different when all the attention was on you. Biting her lip, she followed after the dragoon in silence, slowing down as they walked into a round building.

The people thinned out the further into the dilapidated town the couple traveled. In the near distance, he could see a few buildings (Sharlayan architecture) and figured someone there had some knowledge about their lodging arrangements for the evening.

Inside the rounded building, a woman greeted him and the small padjal as they entered the establishment.

"How can I help you both today?"

"A room, or two," Estinien huffed, "I was told our arrangements were made ahead of time."

"Hm," the woman smiled an empty smile at him, her eyes scanning him over before shifting to Ran-E's horns. The change in the woman's expression was easily noticeable, even to someone like Estinien who lacked in social awareness. He stepped between the woman's eyesight and the girl he escorted.

"Rooms. Lodging. A meal. Or are you incompetent?"

Watching Estinien speak to the woman, she noticed that there was no confirmation of reservations, names, or anything. Feeling her skin crawl, it was then that she knew they stuck out far too much and she shrunk behind her companion.

Perhaps if she thought small, she'd disappear.

"Right," her voice was flat, her empty smile returning, "Of course, Ser. The Lord Commander of Ishgard got in contact with us a few days ago. Let me grab what all you have paid for."  
Estinien crossed his arms over his chest, the plate mail clinking and clanking together, sheening as it rubbed. The woman returned, her eyes dead after years of beratement from various customers like himself, and handed him a single key. "A room for two, dinner for the night and breakfast in the morning, and your key will also work for our bathing in the back of the building — overlooking the magnificent mountainside of the Hinterlands. We hope you enjoy your stay." She bowed her head and gestured for him to exit and find his room.

As the two talked, she wrung her hands around her staff and listened in on every other word. The woman's voice felt almost distant, not necessarily making her feel unwelcome but...maybe it would've been better to sleep on the airship or camp outside.

" _A_ room? A single room? But we are two!" He griped, slamming the key down on the counter top.

_A room for two._

"Yes, Ser," she slid it back over to him, "that's all that's been paid for."

Estinien held down a growl in the back of his throat. In his annoyance, he snatched the key again and took the padjal by her hand once more and led her away down the hall, searching for their room.

Looking up with wide eyes and brows raised in surprise, Ran-E looked between the woman and Estinien. Opening her mouth to speak, she ended up pursing her lips and following after Estinien and his rough grip once more. It'd be a lie to say that it didn't hurt a bit but it was easy to push it at the back of her mind.

"Estinien..." She started as they approached their shared room, "I can pay for another room if this is bothersome...I should have more than enough gil for it."

Soon enough, the two stood in front of the door to their room and she kept her gaze down. It was just their luck that she had to become even more of a burden than in the beginning. Tightening her grip on her staff, and subconsciously on his hand, she felt her heart clench.

"I'm sorry... it's probably better that you finally get some privacy. You probably..."  
The dragoon raised an eyebrow and peered over to her over his shoulder. The key in the keyhole clicked and the door unlocked. "You talk too much..." he muttered, pushing the door open and moving aside to let her in first, "Especially a lot of nonsense. Just get in."

"Ah...I'll try to refrain then... um. Thank you..." Looking towards him and the door, she bowed her head briefly and made her way into the room.

She wasn't quite a burden to him. She was a job. Take her where she needs to get to, and safely, and be paid, be forgiven for his sins. She was a means to an end. No matter what happened during this, it was going to have to just be dealt with.

The paper on the wall was a deep indigo, patterned with a silver and white flower pattern. The floor was elegant tiles, very much Sharlayan in design. A large bed took place with its head against the wall, ornate and decorated with golden laced pillows. A dresser here, a rug there, and a window looking out to the mountains outside, a heavy fog settling in.

The room itself was far nicer than she expected. While she wasn't expecting a few popoto sacks and a dingy bed, she also wasn't expecting a large bed and ornate decorations all over. If she had to be honest, the room vaguely reminded her of her own back in Ishgard. It was clear that Aymeric wasn't against spending a little extra gil here and there for his friends and colleagues.

She also had to admit that it was taking every ounce of her being not to jump onto the plush bed and stretch out. Instead she placed down her pack and leaned her staff against the wall.

"A bit too...noble, for my tastes..." Estinien mumbled to himself, closing and locking the door behind him. "I'll leave in a moment to retrieve our luggage and make arrangements with the airship captain. What will you do?"

"I was thinking a bath would be nice after all the traveling..." Ran-E mused in response to his question when her brain finally processed his words. "Oh! But I can help with the luggage! I wouldn't want to make you do everything!"

"Take your bath," he demanded before bending over and removing his leg braces and tossing them to the side, "then I can take mine when I return with everything." Then he removed his braces and tossed them on top of the nearby chair. Next his belt, his chest plate, and topped the pile with the helm.

"Oh! Um.. if you're sure..." she trailed off, forcing her gaze off of the elezen. As she began to remove her coat, she couldn't help but glance back over and take in his form. Her brothers and sisters would be so disappointed in her, but gods his thighs were far thicker than she thought they would be. Pursing her lips, she turned her head back towards the corner and dropped her coat down on top of her things.

He stretched his arms high above his head and bent over again, stretching his back like a coeurl kitten. The clothes he wore underneath were covered in holes and rips and were clearly worn in. If he remembered right, it would be about two trips worth of grabbing their bags and supplies if he were to retrieve them all. But for just a single night, he supposed he could only fetch their personal bags with their clothes.

"I'll be back with our things. Don't take too long in the bath. And lock the door from the inside when you leave."

And with that, he left the room.

"Okay! Um, thank you... for getting our luggage!" She called after him as he left.

And with that, she was alone.

Plopping down onto the mattress, Ran-E raised her hands to slap her cheeks. Her chilled hands stung against her just as frozen cheeks as they warmed up from the touch. Her mind swam with questions as she slowly processed what she had just done. Falling onto her side, she covered her face with her hands and tried to get out whatever was plaguing her when a new thought came into her mind.

_There's only one bed!_

Shooting up from her position, she stood and stared in horror at the single large bed that sat in the room and realized that she'd have to share a bed with the man.

"Oh no. Ohhh no, I don't think I can do this..."

After taking a short moment to gather herself, Ran-E finally picked out a change of clothes from her bag and left for the baths, making sure to lock the door as she was asked. It wasn't a long walk to the baths and it especially didn't take long for her to strip down and shower before submerging herself in the hot spring water.

With a deep exhale, she sunk down into the water and felt her muscles relax. Finally, she could take her mind off of every-oh! Maybe she could make the water hotter?

Standing up, she looked around for any coals or hot rocks that might be able to even steam up the bath even further.

oo

"Just the personal belongings for the night," Estinien grunted, lifting the bags from the airship, "The rest can stay on board. We'll meet at noon, enough time for everyone to rest and eat."

"Yes, sir," the captain nodded before shutting himself into his personal captain's quarters on the ship.

_If only the Lord Commander got us a bigger ship and each of us private quarters, we wouldn't be in this run down place._

More stares, more chatter, and more giggling as he stomped past the population of Idyllshire once more to make it to the inn. His skin prickled, like hot sand flowing through his veins and over his bones. He hated crowds. He hated people. He hated everything.

He walked past the inn attendant without words, which he was sure she was more than thrilled about, and made his way directly to their shared room. He unlocked the door, pleased she had listened to his instruction, and quickly locked it again behind him after he entered. The bags shuffled as he set them on the bed, shifting with the contents.

_A single godsdamned bed. Unbelievable._

He knew he wouldn't sleep, most likely, having her in the room unless she used her magic on him again. It would be better for him to just stay awake through the night or sleep outside. He wasn't unfamiliar with sleeping on the ground, or even rooftops if he was that worried about what could be in or on the ground or even brigands bothering him.

Another look around. She wasn't in the room, obviously, but he was sure he had been gone long enough that she should be done and even on her way back. He stripped naked, tossing his clothes on top of his armor, and fetched a towel to wrap around his waist.

With the key in hand, towel wrapped tight, the elezen man left the room. He locked it tight and sauntered down the hall, scanning over door after door in search of these illustrious mountain view baths. At long last at the end of the hallway, he found the doorway to paradise and pushed his way through.

Spotting a bed of rocks with a wooden bucket of water nearby, Ran-E grinned and leaned forward to reach for the ladle. Supporting her weight with one hand against the side of the bath, she scooped up some water when a familiar voice made her jump. As she clumsily splashed the water against the rocks, the hissing steam fought her yelp as she nearly slipped from her position.

What he had not expected was seeing the very naked padjal girl still enjoying the bath herself, back to the door.

"Ah," Estinien spoke curtly, "didn't know you were still bathing. Well..."

Turning her head towards the man, she immediately turned her head back and covered her eyes. "E-Estinien!" she cried out weakly, her body unsure how to move in order to better conceal herself. Luckily for whatever modesty that remained, she knelt down into the water with her arms around her chest.

Without hesitation, Estinien removed his towel around his waist, hanging it on a nearby towel rack, and stepped gingerly to the bath. The steam rose seductively, calling his name. He hissed entering the bath, soon turning to a low moan as he sat on a far edge and lowered himself to his shoulders, his tension melting away.

Hesitantly peeking back towards the man to check for his own modesty, a moan made its way to her ears and she sunk down further as her cheeks burned bright red. There was absolutely no way the gods decided to curse her very being with so many...inappropriate situations with this man. Wading her way towards the opposite end, she was disappointed to find that the bath was not nearly as large as she hoped. She faced the wall and stared down at her hair that floated out around her, at a loss for words.

Should she just get up and leave? If she did, there'd be a chance that he'd see her completely naked and her heart pounded at that idea. There was no way with the slippery floor that she'd be able to escape quickly. Of course he could turn away but she was already being so much trouble and her mind was swimming.

As she strayed further into thought and away from the situation, she unconsciously let out a heavy sigh.

He lifted himself out of the water, but only slightly, stretching and resting his arms along the edge of the bath. His icey eyes stared down the padjal before turning his attention to the mountainous view.

It was...something, alright. Not many wonders of the world surprised him or inspired awe in him. They barely did to begin with, but especially now. Everything is so small, so insignificant, through the eyes of dragons.

Her sigh captured his attention, in ways it shouldn't. He knew, logically, that her sigh was nothing if not expressed in annoyance. And yet, he felt a stir within him. Something primal. Something unsavory.

But he couldn't act on those thoughts, those urges. He knew he unfairly put her in a precarious situation. And he knew he only felt this way because of their situation. She was much too young, too naive, too simple.

And he was weighed down underneath his mountain of sins.

The sound of water sloshing around ever so slightly brought her out of her thoughts and she peeked over her shoulder at the man. There was something in the way his hair framed his face and how the light hit his jaw that made her all the more self-conscious of her staring. Biting her lip, she brushed her fingers through her hair and brought part of it over her shoulders in hopes its length would help keep her chest somewhat covered. Turning slightly in order to better face her companion, she tried to relax as she leaned her side against the wall of the bath.

"Es..." she started quietly, suddenly unsure of what exactly she wanted to say. She knew it would be more than fine to leave the air silent save for the ambient noises of trickling water and small bursts of steam, but it felt awkward. She felt compelled to start some sort of conversation but she had no idea what topic to raise with him. Well actually, there were a few that came to mind but she wasn't sure which one might upset him and how to bring up anything.

But if she took too long to say anything now (if he even noticed her trying to speak up), it would surely annoy him and he'd end up being upset with her once more.

"E....eh-it's a pretty nice view, isn't it?"

_Gods be gentle on her stupid soul._

"Um, that is—actually, I wanted to ask you..." She chewed briefly on her bottom lip, working at the tender skin. "When we met, you didn't seem fazed or confused on what a Padjal is...but I know from my short time in Ishgard that Padjals aren't well known considering the, ah, attention I received. You...are you familiar with Padjals?"

A stupid question, asking about the view, and was one he didn't bother answering. Of course it was a nice view, if he cared for such things. It was definitely not an eyesore to say the least. But her second question caught his attention more. Naturally, she wondered about her horns, her status, her place in the world, and how he was already so familiar. He thought he had mentioned it but perhaps he only thought it and omitted speaking his thoughts for once.

"I'm of the Twelveswood. I'm of Gridania. I am not unfamiliar with the leader of the Adders, nor her gaggle of followers," he spat the words like venom on his tongue, his arms falling into the water. Tumultuous, the water swirled, folded over itself, and waves splashed against the edges of the bath. "I've seen your kind—Padjals—keeping secrets, disallowing anyone from learning your trades."

In his belly anger bubble. Leftover hatred that lay dormant for years rose like acid in his esophagus. His knuckles pained him. It wasn't so unfamiliar a feeling. It was as if Nidhogg still remained within him, tainting his heart in pure darkness. Did he really harbor such intense hatred for so long, or was it exaggerated?

Bright blue eyes now fully focused on the man, her eyebrows knitted together in worry. While she had gotten the answer she hoped to receive, she wasn't prepared for his reaction at all. In Limsa it was normal for people to be rude from time to time and she had her run-ins with the occasional over-friendly drunk. In Gridania, she was generally met with respect and kindness. Even now in Ishgard, those she spoke with tended to treat her with a modicum of respect. Now, however, she was met with such a harsh tone that she couldn't help but draw back an ilm.

What does she say? He, a native Gridanian a few years older than her, clearly knew far more about her race than she did thus far. At a loss for words, she slowly hung her head down and sank deeper into the water, allowing him to sling his words at her.

The Padjals treated her well and welcomed her with open, albeit wary, arms. She was grateful for their warmth and the knowledge, the magicks, they bestowed unto her, but she never realized how little she truly knew of them. Of course there was the history lessons and stories she was given, but what of the experiences of those around them?

"At least the lancer guild allows anyone who's willing to put in the work into their ranks. Had they not, I would have never—ah!" Estinien growled in pain, clutching the sides of his head. 

Immediately, hot, searing pain blinded him and rendered him immobile and sick. He squeezed his temples, his skull, between his hands. What he would give to be able to squeeze with the strength of a dragon and pop his head like a grape, granting him the relief he'd dreamt about.

He thrashed in the water. What in the world was happening to him to sunder him apart so?

"—ah!"

Snapping her head up, Estinien thrashed about with his hands gripping desperately at his head. Standing from her position, she fought against the water's resistance and moved as hastily as she could towards him.

"Graah—! K...kill me, please... End this suffering..."

A single tear escaped the confines of his long eyelashes and meandered over the contour of his cheek bones and sallow face.

_End this suffering…_

His words...the way it reached her ears broke her heart.

Frantically splashing through the water, she finally reached his side and...her mind went blank save for the list of spells she knew. Her hands hovered over his form as she tried to decide where to best place them.

"Fuck...!"

Deciding Asylum would again be the best course of action, she did her best to channel as much aether through her body. The almost painful tingle reminded her why staves were so useful in channeling.

Gently placing her hands on him, one on his back and the other moving to wrap around his front, she leaned in to hold him close. The familiar tingle of healing magick bristled against her skin as the air filled with a gentle light. She hoped that, through her touch, whatever healing she could channel would mend the pain.

His immediate reaction was to push her away, to throw her down and to incapacitate her. If he still had the dragon in his veins, he'd extend his talons and pierce her throat and watch her gasp for air. But the tingles were immediate and the splitting headache soon faded. His thrashing slowed and waned. Blood coursed through his veins hot enough to make the water feel cold around him. His body slumped over into the girl next to him.

With arms and lids heavy, Estinien let his body go limp. Lack of awareness of what was happening around him led his head to roll over his shoulder and rest against the padjal's shoulder. He has half submerged in the hot spring bath water. Strands of white hair fell into his face, tickling the tip of his nose and getting trapped in his eyelashes.

"Why..." he rasped, exhausted, "Why won't you let me die... Why am I cursed to continue on..."

With his weight, her foot slipped a bit as she struggled to hold him up. Using the wall to steady herself, she just barely pulled him up to hold onto him more comfortably. Looking over to him, she reached up to push away the strands of hair that fell into his face.

"Oh... Estinien..." She muttered, her heart aching further at his pain. There was absolutely no way she'd ever be able to understand what he was going through. He had experienced so much more than her even in half her lifetime and so even with her healing magicks she felt...useless.

Pushing aside her insecurities, she huffed and moved her arms to rest under his and around his torso. She cursed her lack of strength as she then attempted to move out of the bath and at least onto the flat ground or steps into the baths. Moving slowly, she began to drag the much larger man out of the water. As she did, she imbued her touch with a Regen spell with hopes of alleviating his suffering.

She'd definitely need to use a spell or two on her soon to be strained arms after this.

Finally towards the steps of the bath, she pulled him up and out of the water as much as she could, bashfully keeping her eyes on his torso and up. Setting him to turn onto his side, she stood and grabbed their towels and draped one over his lower body. Truth be told, she felt it was more for her than him as she had a faint idea he cared little about nudity. Wrapping herself up next, she knelt next to him and began to push more hair out of his face.

With another forceful cast of Asylum, the room began to glow with the same light as before, but this time it was brighter.

"I don't know what you think of yourself...but I can tell you're a good person..." Ran-E spoke softly, more to herself than to him. "You're just a hurt person..."

And for him, she'd stay in the bath and nurse him back to health for as long as she needed to, mission be damned.

Light filtered through his eyelashes as he opened his eyes, blinking like butterfly wings. It was a glowing and sparkling light, and low. Where was he? Why was he on the floor?

He lifted his head just a bit and looked around. Next to him he came face to face with the toweled figure of the girl.

His body jolted and he turned away, reaching desperately for his lance. His chest heaved and his heart raced. Although his body felt heavy, his panic didn't cease.

"What in the hells happened? Did you knock me out?" With each word he bared his teeth more and more. Times like these he wished he still had the impressive fangs he shared with the demon dragon.

Across his lap he felt the towel fall, but he didn't care. His nudity didn't bother him when his travel companion could so easily and continuously render him unconscious at any time.

Jumping at the sudden movement, Ran-E started to reach out when her towel began to slip. Deciding that she could leave him be for just a second more, she fastened her towel even tighter this time before moving back to give the man some space. Reaching a hand out, she hesitated to touch him and decided to touch the ground instead.

"Estinien...you had a fit and blacked out. You need to calm down and stop moving about so abruptly," she spoke in as even a tone as she could, keeping eye contact with him. "I think it's best if we conclude the bath and get you back to the room."

Allowing her magick to fade, the light began to dim and she stood from her position. Despite all the steam in the room, a chill ran through her body and a part of her wondered if maybe they should return to Ishgard instead. While the man was certainly a powerful warrior, she wasn't sure he was in any shape to be traveling. Right now, however, the only thing she needed to do right now was get them both dressed and out of the bath.

Turning to the man, she reached out her hands to help him onto his feet.

The dragoon had half a mind to slap her hand away and to tell her to piss off back to the Twelveswood. The other half told him to suck it up and be the bodyguard he's being paid to be. Inside he felt a small semblance of guilt for letting his rage get the better of him and forcing him into such a fit he needed to be sedated, even if by mere sleep magic.

With a huff and a grunt, he took her small hand in his and used her assistance to stand. He was well aware he towered over her, but without the armor and clothes to hide their forms, he was much more aware of how small she was. And young. And he felt a bit more disgusting than before he got into the bath in the first place.

He quickly averted his eyes in search of his towel, long cast aside. Estinien scrambled toward it, tying it around his waist. And for once, he was looking forward to being dressed.

"Let's go, then," he grumbled, making his way to the door and opening it for her to step through first, "And...s...rry... for ruining your bath..."

Letting her gaze follow his up, she felt heat ringing her cheeks as she tried to keep her eyes anywhere but past his torso. Once he moved to fetch his towel, she turned her head away and waited for him to return. He was suddenly so quiet and, dare she say, docile.

She had no idea what to think about this almost sheepish version of him.

Following after him, she stepped through the door when he apologized. His words ran through her mind a few times before she turned to look at him, her surprise clear on her face.

“I...You didn’t ruin my bath,” she said reassuringly, “What would have ruined my bath would be if strangers burst in here or if you, I don’t know, suddenly dropped dead in the waters.” 

_Stop rambling._

“My point being, as long as you’re beginning to feel better, you absolutely have not ruined anything.” She began to reach out and place a hand on his arm but quickly changed her mind, letting her arm fall to her side.

Taking a breath, she turned towards her clothes and picked them up, keeping her back towards Estinien. Trying to cast away her shyness in order to dress quickly to help him, she hesitantly dropped her towel and pulled on her smallclothes. She hastily pulled on her sleeping gown, glad she opted for it rather than anything that would take longer, and turned back.

“If you’re still feeling unsteady, allow me to assist you.” Because cracking his skull open would fall under ways to ruin this bath.

"I can walk fine," he snapped. _I think…_

"Oh. Alright... but don't hesitate should you need help...please."

Estinien led the way again, his thoughts nagging at him in the back of his mind. He wanted this mission over. He wanted to go home and be left alone. Bodyguard duty was only half worth it if he could actually slay a monster or a brigand. Being in such close quarters with his subject seemed...inappropriate at best.

The room was as quiet as it was left. Their things undisturbed, as it should be. The window still curtained away. Dark settled quickly, but the streetlamps (if the winding paths could be considered streets to begin with) kept the darkest clutches away.

She hung her head low, watching his feet as she walked with him to their room. It was quiet save for their feet against the floorboards and the faint muffled rustling of leaves from outside. Nature felt strange here.

He quickly grabbed another torn shirt, equally as ripped as the one he wore previously, but stained twice over with blood, and threw it over his head. It felt heavy on his shoulders, but he had no time to really consider such thoughts. With one leg then the other he pulled his small clothes on under his towel before tossing it to the corner and subsequently pulling his ripped slops over his legs.

Once in the room, she draped her towel over a chair and reached into her bag to pull out a brush. Glancing over towards Estinien, she noticed him move for the door. Her heart began to race and she moved quickly, reaching out to lightly tug on his sleeve.

"I'll leave you for the night. See you in the morning."

"Don't! I mean...I can't stop you but," her voice wavered with uncertainty as she tried to keep him in the room. "I'd prefer if you stayed here...just in case you fall under another spell. I can sleep in the chair so we don't have to share a bed. Just...I..." 

_I'm worried._

Gripping her brush in one hand, her other gripped tighter on the fabric of his sleeve as she kept her eyes down. He was just going to scoff at her and leave. 

Silly girl, why do you think he would ever listen to you?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. ♥


	3. Chapter 3

The air he held whistled out of his lungs, deflating his chest. He scowled and he huffed. What did this girl think she was doing? Was she not aware how much older he was than her? Stronger? Much more dangerous in every aspect? And yet she still wished for him to stay with her. But sharing a bed was out of the question. It crossed too many lines in their professional relationship, regardless if he personally cared or not. The last thing he needed was word getting back to Ishgard and the Lord Commander about how he shared a bed with the body he's supposed to be guarding.

"Don't be ridiculous," he responded, "I'll take the chair."

Whipping her head up in surprise, she then shook it adamantly.

“B-but I’m the one who insisted..! It’s the least I can do...” She slowly released her grip on his shirt, finally looking down at it. It was far more worn, far more stained than she expected.

He couldn't argue with the logic of staying in as well, to make sure she remained safe. If he slept outside, especially on the roof, there was no guarantee that someone couldn't try and sneak past him. 

This just was the opposite of the ideal situation.

"Are you even tired yet?" Estinien growled.

“Ah! No... I’m not tired yet. I planned on reading a bit before bed… How about you?”

Ran-E moved back a touch before turning back to move her things off the chair. As she rearranged her belongings, she settled herself into the chair in hopes that Estinien would give up in favor of the bed instead. Hesitantly glancing towards him, she began to brush her hair and waited for him to berate her for not listening to him.

He shuffled across the room after she sat herself in the chair and returned to her hair care routine. He sat on the edge of the bed, facing her, letting his silver locks fall over his shoulders as he leaned forward, propping his elbows on his knees and intertwining his fingers. The slender chin of the elezen rests on the protruding thumbs, his scowl unhidden.

"Tired has lost meaning to me," he muttered through his clenched jaw. “Get out of the chair. Lord Commander will have my head if I so much as not give you everything you want so do as I say and we'll continue being at peace."

If she refused again, he had no qualms with using his physical strength and size to simply lift her out of it and onto the bed once it was time for them to finally sleep. Not like he _would_ sleep, but he could at least get somewhat comfortable in the chair and find something to do or read.

Pulling the brush through her hair one more time, she pursed her lips and felt a touch of anxiety bubble in her gut. It really took no time at all for him to become annoyed with her.

“But this is what I want. You deserve to be more well rested than I—oh!” At the sudden thought of her medicines, she stood. She knew this would give up the chair but this is definitely more important than being stubborn. Going to her bag, she searched for a moment before pulling out a small bottle.

“I’ve just the tincture for rest. If you’d like, I can make us some tea and you can take it that way. I’ve also got some lavender tea from the Shroud.” She looked up from the small bottle towards him, a hopeful smile on her face. “And if you’d like, um, I can help you...brush your hair so it does not tangle overnight...”

Immediately her ears began to burn with shame. Stupid, why on earth would you offer something that he clearly didn’t care about. His hair was probably the length it was because he didn’t care to cut it, she thought to herself. Her smile slowly dropped and eventually as did her gaze.

Maybe everything she’s done thus far is a mistake.

_So she grows more and more ridiculous._

"So you presume to drug me, and then touch my hair?" Estinien scoffs; almost laughs. It's a funny thought, he had to admit. He'd been almost killed many times by many different people, he's sure if he let his guard down at any point more people would have attempted to poison him. At least, he was sure Alphinaud entertained the thought daily when they traveled with the Warrior of Light, prior to his merge with the Eye.

She lost her train of thought immediately after " _So you presume to drug me…_ " and stumbled over herself in her effort to stand up. On her knees, she frantically shook her head.

"No! No, of course not! I just...I wanted to...!" Ah. Of course he didn't genuinely believe she meant to drug him. Falling back onto her butt, she looked down at the bottle with a pout. "I just wanted to help you relax..."

After all, even the greatest warrior is sure to be brought down should they lack proper rest.

"You humor me, girl," he muttered, releasing his fingers from each other and putting his hands behind him, propping him up as he leaned back and stretched out his long legs before standing and moving to the chair.

He crossed one leg over his other and subsequently his arms over his chest. "I've heard rumor that my hair is the source of envy in many. Not sure I understand why."

Slipping the bottle back into her bag, she moved towards the bed to sit on the edge. "Your hair is striking. Not only in color but its length is admirable... I admit that your hair is one of the first things I noticed about you." 

_Well, after the startling appearance and the armor, of course._

"I'm envious. I wish for my hair to be longer... unfortunately it grows at an exasperatingly slow rate..." She just barely mumbled, picking at her own red locks. "It must be a pain to care for when you're constantly garbed in armor, though."

"Precisely why I _don't_ care for it. I'm far too busy to take care of something as trivial as hair. If I had more time," _And possibly more trust_ , the elezen thought to himself, "I'd cut it all off just to not have to deal with it."

"Ah... but it'd be such a shame to cut it all off," she mused mostly to herself. She pulled her legs up and wrapped her arms around them, perching her chin just over her knees.

A stray hand made its way to his crown and his fingers combed through the silver strands, taking a lock between two fingers and inspecting it. At the ends it frayed in wild directions, mimicking a spiderweb more than anything else.

Watching him inspect his own hair, she couldn't help but smile softly at him. It was strange to her to think that while taking care of his hair was too trivial, somehow letting it grow longer was easier? While she had little experience with men outside of a few teachers and her new brothers, she had never met anyone quite like Estinien. He had a few odd tendencies but she didn't mind them. ~~They were kind of adorable in a strange way, she refused to admit.~~

"Regardless...." he continued on, absentmindedly, "piling it up in the helmet works well enough. I've only had a couple cases of it spilling out and getting caught or tangled."

This was the most he talked in... well, a very long time. He preferred his silence. He preferred his solitude. But it was fine speaking plainly with the young girl. She somehow didn't mind his outbursts or the headaches he suffered. She spoke with him kindly enough. But petty judgement sometimes hides behind nice words.

"The color is odd, I suppose," he mused, releasing the lock, the strands whispering against his bloody shirt, "I often get asked my age over it."

"In this realm, nothing is odd anymore," she tilted her head to better look at him. "I've learned when elementals stop your physical growth but allow you gifts you never wanted...when they make you..." 

_Grow horns and turn pale grey with time._

She released a huff and furrowed her brows, turning her attention towards the wall instead. "I've learned that nothing is odd any longer and age is a gift." Gods how she longed to look her age or older, to be taken seriously and treated normally. She just wanted to be a Hyur again.

 _Age as a gift?_ He pondered her words, mulling over them in his mind. Estinien wasn't old, but he wasn't exactly the picture of youth either. The bags under his bruised eyes weighed tonnes and tonnes somedays, and his back often hurt if he sat too long. But this girl talked well past her years and seemed more aged than his own mother.

His eyes caught a glimpse of her in her vulnerability. Wrapped up in herself, the soft curve of her face into her chin, resting on her knees. She was so small. Or was he just tall? After all he had seen, he wasn't quite sure what was average or normal anymore.

"How old _are_ you, girl? And don't think to lie to me." The tone of his voice was demanding. There was no reason for her to lie to him, he thought, but it became a habit to presume everyone lied.

Scoffing at his words, she shook her head and glared harshly at the wall. She forgot that he obviously didn’t know her age. It’s not exactly one of the very first things you tell people when you meet them. His words made her all the more aware that he had been treating her like a child all this time.

“In the Sixth Astral Moon I will have officially seen 24 years.”

The words stung a bit and she turned her head to bury her face slightly into her knees. Of course he treated her like a babysitting assignment all this time. She clenched her fists in frustration, thinking back to the past few days with him. All his patience with her rambling and mistakes must have been because he thought her a child. It hurt.

“But this is as old as I’ll ever appear...” she muttered quietly, mostly to herself.

"Twenty four..." he muttered to himself, running a hand through the long silver hair. Gods, she was older than he thought but still quite young.

"Twenty four and complaining," he scoffed leaning forward. Elbows dug into his thighs, fingers lacing together tightly.

Once more he looked over her small frame, making note of the rough look to the horns and the sad slump of her shoulders. _Godsdamnit…_ He tried to think of the embarrassment she felt. When he pulled her around like an impudent child. He should know what youth can accomplish, even if eternal.

"I... apologize... I did not know."

He knew of the padjali, and the stories and rumors that floated around the Twelveswood, but he never really paid them any mind. The only thing that had mattered to him was the false acceptance they spouted with venom laced in every word.

Burying her face further into her arms, she closed her eyes and listened to his muttering and scoffing. Despite his disgruntled tone, he believed her. He believed her without a shred of doubt and that lifted her spirit.

Turning her head to peek up at him, she lowered her arms some and gave him a weak smile.

"’Tis okay. Most do not, but most also do not care to ask."

Letting the moment stand still for a touch longer, she watched him carefully. He looked as tense as she felt and this tugged at her heart.

"Estinien...tell me, what is...your opinion of Gridania and the Padjal? Earlier you...well, you seemed like you have strong opinion." And he also knew more of Gridania of its history as well as more common knowledge of Padjal than she.

"My opinion?" Not many _asked_ for his opinion, he usually just gave it whether it was wanted or not or kept to himself completely. Though, it wasn't too out there that she'd be curious after his outburst.

"Well..." he began, twiddling his thumbs over each other, still propping his elbows on his legs, "Gridania is cramped and the Padjal are haughty. That's about all there is to really know about it."

There were times in his past he'd rather not discuss, and there were moments he didn't want to taint for her. She had no choice in being a Padjal, in being confined to the Twelveswood, for the most part, and to follow the will of elementals invisible to regular people and the Elderseer.

The image of Kan-e-Senna in his mind was cast in a dark light. The cold chill of her voice, her stare, everything about her. There was little that struck him to his core so, but she was the one to do it.

"Is that what you truly think?" His words were very curt and precise, there was no way that he didn't mean what he said. It's true, from her time in Gridania, that she could see why so many can see the city-state is.. less than desirable. "While I can see the issues many take with Gridanians, my Padjali brothers and sisters...they've been nothing but kind to me."

Twining strands of hair between her fingers, she stared down at its bright red tone. "While I know very little of Gridania and am still learning Padjali history, I see not of the 'haughtiness' you mention. Of course, I am of them..." 

_But still, I'm an outsider,_ she thought to herself.

The Padjali were kind and welcoming the second she showed up at the guild. So to hear that they might be...arrogant towards others was troublesome. Thoughts of the Padjal speaking of her behind her back or perhaps sending her away to Ishgard to distance her from them swarmed her mind.

The apprehension in her voice and in her mannerisms weren't missed by the elezen man who sat still, his eyes following the movement of her hands. It would be ridiculous for her to understand what he had experienced as one of the Twelveswood, but not of the padjali, nor of the elezen families welcome to Gridania either.

"I wouldn't worry if I were you, perhaps," he muttered, keeping his gaze hard on her. "You are one of them. You are protected, in more ways than you may know. Why trust the word of an outcast, anyway?"

The question was rhetorical, said with a bite that could rip flesh from bone. It wasn't her fault, after all, that the Elderseer sent him to his death in the wood. It wasn't her fault he took revenge on the dragon that destroyed Ishgard, the only sanctuary he had in his worst days.

Looking towards him once more, she couldn't help her surprised expression. Her ears tingled as they warmed up at his reassuring words as it was the last thing she expected from him. With a soft smile, she leaned back into a more comfortable position.

Who would've thought the harsh dragoon would spare such words?

"It matters not if you're an outcast. Trust is built on your character and... I trust you, Estinien."

"Where were you from before being called by the elementals?"

Feeling her ears burn and the warmth slowly bleed onto her cheeks. She hadn't done anything but speak her mind but somehow it felt like a bold move. Shaking it off, she tried to hide her cheeks by playing with her hair some more and answering his question.

"Before Gridania I lived in La Noscea. My parents moved to Limsa before I was born and soon we moved to Wineport." She lightly tapped at one of her horns. "They wanted to hide me from others but of course, there's no hiding from elementals."

Although it was rather quiet in Dravania and, while she had no idea why, it was rather nice to hear the voices turn into whispers.

"La Noscea?" He repeated, raising an eyebrow, "Really? Hm."

He dropped his arms into his lap like heavy weights and with a sigh. His neck popped with the roll of it to the side and then the back before dropping his head down so his gaze focused on his hands in his lap.

"Yes, I adore the ocean," the Padjal's voice was light and full of poorly hidden joy, "Costa del Sol is beautiful and I'm thankful I lived so close to it.. I miss it every... day..."

She said she trusted him. A foolish mistake. He wasn't worth trust. He wasn't worth an afterthought. He was just doing his job, and his job didn't require trust.

She was too trusting Of strangers, especially strange men who were much bigger and a bit older than her. He could easily take advantage of her if he was the least bit interested in her.

A lesson needed to be taught.

"You trust me?" He asked to clarify, but waited for no response. "I wouldn't..."

Estinien raised himself from his chair and closed the distance between them in two steps. He towered over her and it reminded him just how small she was. To increase his intimidating factor, he furrowed his brows as he leaned down, planting both hands on either side of her on the bed. Noses merely centimeters apart, he whispered, "...if I were you."

Her bright blue eyes watched him as he rose from his chair and crossed the room with ease. The air around him changed as he leaned in, encroaching on her space. Her lips parted as her eyes darted across his face. Her ears burned even further as the scent of the bath and soap overtook her senses.

As he leaned into her, he could pick up her own garden-like scent of roses and berries. It was also incredibly easy for him to watch her hesitant eyes, hear her breath catch, and take in every little action.

"But—" her voice was low and nearly cracked, but she steeled herself and didn't move. "But...I do, as do many others."

He was overwhelming. Everything about Estinien was hard and rough, he was raised and trained to best foes with his incredible feats of athleticism. He was the complete opposite of her.

However, Aymeric would never allow her to travel with someone that would endanger her, nor would Estinien have been trusted with his title should he not be an honest man. Well, at least that's what Haurchefant told her.

"You're a good man...just a tired man." A man that refused help.

"Is that what the others said?" He continued to whisper.

The tired and bruised eyelids hung heavy over his eyes, showing his age and exhaustion plain as a dragon blacking out the sun.

"They said I'm trustworthy? Perhaps honorable?"

With calculated movement, he lifted a hand from the bed and took a lock of her brilliant red hair in between his lithe and calloused fingers—a result of his many years of lance wielding.

"But they only know a part of me they like to see. They haven't seen the part that lives in the dark, who feeds on the danger around him"

"It's what I think." Ran-E spoke confidently.

With her nerves steeled and bravery running through her, the Padjal reached up and cupped his cheek, gently rubbing her thumb across the warm skin. Her wide and trusting eyes watched him, an even expression on as she took him in. Her ears burned as she realized just how handsome he really was, but this wasn't the time... and in all honesty, there would never be a time. Not for her.

Her hand, soft and gentle, slowly moved down his cheek and down his neck, resting in the crook of where his neck and shoulder met. Her touch was warm and soothing, but this time not filled with healing magicks and instead her own kindness.

"I think... you just thrive on having purpose, as many others do," she said in a low and careful voice. "I.. I also crave having purpose...as horrible as it sounds. After all, there's no need for healers if no one is hurt." It was at those last words that her eyes fell, her gaze falling down to her legs.

She was ashamed to admit it, but she was thankful to be handed her burden of a heritage. Being a white mage was just stressful and demanding, but she was glad that she didn't have to search for her place in the world. She didn't have to be lost.

He looked down at her. Down his pointed nose, down to the bright eyes looking up at him, taking him in. A shiver ran down his spine as she traced down his neck to his shoulder, leaving little sparks on his nerves trailing after her touch.

With an exasperated sigh, he rolled his head into her touch, closer to the hand resting on his shoulder, "It's not awful to want to have a job and a purpose, regardless of what it is. At least you're not the one causing the harm, unlike some people."

His rough nails, chipped and hard, scratched at the fabric of the bed sheets. The fingers holding her hair dropped it and fell back to the spot on the bed at her side.

"It's getting late," he said matter-of-factly, "Get some rest. We'll leave in the morning."

He knew he should lift himself from her. He knew he should go back to the chair at the corner of the room, beckoning him to find comfort and solace in its embrace, but his body was heavy and he wanted just a moment longer there before knowing he would most likely stay awake all night watching over her.

Letting her gaze linger on her legs as he spoke, a certain feeling buried itself in the bottom of her gut. She was nervous and sad, wondering what else she could do aside from gently rubbing a thumb against the tender skin of his neck. It was clear he had his defenses up and what right did she have to even examine them?

She barely had the right to be a white mage.

The room was quiet save for their breathing, the young woman finding herself honing in on his even breaths. What was on his mind? What was bothering him? What did he want?

Slowly peeking back up at him, bright eyes meeting dark ones, she raised another hand to his cheek. “Will you please stay with me tonight? N-not in the same room but instead um, in the same bed.” Her neck and cheeks began to flush a light pink as she tried to finish her thought. “I’ll sleep above the sheets with you under but I just really want you to be well rested. You deserve it.”

Seconds lingered into minutes the longer he looked down at her and blinked blankly. It was completely inappropriate for him to even be considering the option instead of outright saying no. He knew he couldn’t sleep with or next to people, as evident when he was forced to share quarters with adventuring companions. It’s what kicked off his ability to sleep anywhere and anytime he could, since he never had a chance to sleep properly unless he was off duty. And even then, his nightmares kept him up into the morning hours more often than not that he would just continue to stay awake for days at a time.

What did she want from him? Could this all have been a trick? She lied about her life, her job, everything, just to get close to certain people for something nefarious?

...no. He may be working for her but he had an innate sense to feel when something dangerous was coming, a lingering remnant of the dragon Nidhogg when they inhabited the same body, and mind.

Estinien could hear it now. The voices of Aymeric and Haurchefant, even Alphinaud and the Warrior of Light, scolding him for sharing a bed with the client, the one he was supposed to protect. His job is to remain vigilant and to keep her safe from all harm, including himself. But her question rang in his head over and over again. The shy way she looked at him and the pink blush of her cheeks, neck, and the tips of her ears.

And when _was_ the last time he really got to sleep in a bed rather than a blanket thrown over a couple barrels or boxes?

“Hmph...” he grunted, his body weight shifting slightly, “Is that what you really want? What if I keep you awake all night? You won’t be so useful if you’re exhausted.”

"Neither will you."

Pushing a few strands of hair out of his face before resting her hands on his chest, Ran-E sat up as much as she could under him. Needless to say, it was awkward. Their chests nearly touched and, despite practically being able to feel his breath brushing against her skin, she felt self-conscious.

The bed's cushion gave under her weight and she slipped as she tried to slide herself out from under him. She let out a small gasp as she instead slid back down, her face leaving his line of sight. All that remained was a mess of red hair and pale horns, her small hands gripping at his tunic.

"Um—I think you'll fend off any enemies better on a full night's rest. So uh, soo... let's rest," she muttered, patting his chest just once and glad she could hide her embarrassment. "Um...I do have medicine to help you fall asleep easier, should you want it.."

She was right. He didn’t want to admit it, but she was. They would both be the most useful and able if they actually got a good night's sleep. He also couldn’t deny the usefulness of her various means and medicines to aid in his sleeping needs.

“Very well.” The hand that still held her hair loosely let it slip through his fingers as she fell to the bed under him, wrapping around the little fist holding his bloody, ripped shirt. “I’ll grant you this if it eases you.”

Gently he pried away the hands holding his shirt so tight and lifted back to his full standing stature, his eyes never leaving hers.

“You’ll have to forgive me for the night...” he muttered, bruised knuckles dusting the cloth of the shirt and lifting it over his head in a swift motion, “But I get incredibly hot when I sleep. I’ll remain on top of the covers.”

He fell to the bed beside her with a muted _thump._ The covers and pillows quickly envelopes him in their soft embrace. It was getting hard to keep his eyes open.

“Remember you asked for this...”

Ran-E's eyes lit up in joy as he finally gave in to her request. As he moved to lay down, she crawled towards her bag and searched around for a moment before pulling out a small vial.

"A muscle relaxant to help healing people! Just a couple drops should be..." Her gaze fell upon Estinien's sleeping form and a small smile made its way to her lips. His brow was still knitted and by no means did he look happy, but he looked at least the tiniest bit at peace.

She put away the vial and readied the room for bed by turning off the lights and adjusting the pillows on her side to better accommodate her horns. Crawling back into bed, she started to curl up but paused to peek back towards the larger man behind her.

"Good night."

With eyes closed, sleep slowly came for her as the day's thoughts left her mind. There were no more dragons, no more elementals, and no more oddly judgmental hostesses giving you strange looks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!! There will be a pause in updates while Kit and I work on writing more for you!


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